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Questions to ask your doctor about perimenopause

Most people think of the right question about ten minutes after the appointment ends. A written list fixes that. It also makes the visit feel less like a quiz and more like a conversation you planned.

The questions below are neutral. They are not medical advice, and they do not assume any particular answer. Choose the ones that fit your situation, change the wording, and cross out the rest.

How to build your list

1. Write down everything you want to ask, with no editing.
2. Circle the three that matter most.
3. Number those three in order.
4. Leave space under each one to write the answer.

Three ranked questions are easier to get through than fifteen unranked ones. The remainder can go on a second list, to ask if there is time or to save for a follow-up.

Questions about what you have noticed

• Based on what I have described, what do you think is worth looking into first?
• Is there anything on my list that you would like more detail about?
• Are there things I have not mentioned that I should be tracking?
• How would you like me to record these, so the information is useful to you?

Questions about next steps

• Are there tests you would suggest, and what would each one tell us?
• If you recommend a test, what happens after the result comes back?
• Is there anything you would like me to do or avoid before the next visit?
• When should I follow up, and who contacts whom?

Questions about options

Your provider is the right person to discuss the options available to you. These questions keep the conversation open without steering it.

• What options exist for what I am experiencing, including doing nothing for now?
• What are the benefits and risks of each option, in my situation?
• What would you want to know about my history before we talk about options?
• How would we decide whether something is working?

Questions about your records

• Can you note my concerns in my chart?
• If a test or referral is not ordered, can you tell me the reason so I can write it down?
• How do I get copies of my results?

If you do not get a full answer

Sometimes a question is answered with a short reply, or not at all. You do not have to accept silence as a result. You can say, "I want to make sure I understand. Can you say that another way?" Or you can ask what you should write down as the answer. If the topic is set aside, ask whether it will be revisited, and note that in your next step line. A record of an unanswered question is still a record.

Questions to ask yourself before you go

• What do I most want to leave with: an explanation, a plan, a test, or a record?
• What am I worried they will dismiss, and how can I show it on paper?
• Who could come with me, if I would like company?

Writing down the answers

It is easy to nod and forget. Leave a line under each question and write a few words as your provider speaks. If you did not catch something, you can say, "Can you repeat that so I get it right?" At the end, read your notes back and ask, "Did I get that right?"

A sample question page

This is an invented example of one question with space for the answer.

Where the Pivot Kit fits

The Pivot Kit includes a decision memo page for questions to ask, options discussed, and what you decided. It organizes the conversation and does not recommend any treatment. It also includes provider scripts, short lines you can read aloud if you find it hard to speak up in the moment.

If you want a place to write the answers, the free Appointment Receipt has a section for what they said, what was ordered or declined, the next step, and your question list.

More guides

• What to Bring to a Perimenopause Appointment
• How to Describe Symptoms to a Provider
• How to Keep a Perimenopause Cycle Log
• Perimenopause Symptom Tracker: What to Track

Educational organization tool. Not medical or legal advice. Samples on this page are invented examples of a format.